I Do Want To Love

I Do Want To Love

You cant help but trick
But u still want me to smile
Expect me to give you a tip
For acting like some pathetic child

Every fuckin day
Its the same shyt
Wake up to a bitch
Walk in to a bitch
Have my attention snatch to a bitch

How can they all be the same
Even the nasty lookin africans playing the same game
With dark skin, light is hardly seen
Then put a mask of a bitch and expect to look maybelline

Even them blancho bitches look disgust with all that fat
Please know having a big ass is only a fags fad
show me one fool that want to fuck his own mother
Try to realize that bitch u chose as a guide is already assigned to go under

I am in a prison full of tricks
I am not looking for love just solace and live
But their are so many of these tricks
Feels like a 3rd world country
Cant find a cave
So I sit alone in a dark room

Wonder how I came to consider my own mother a …
Even if God is testing, to what extent is this?
If I am wrong then perish me already
Their is nothing in this world that I desire to live for

If you tricks cant change than fuck off
Even Joseph got lucky being sent to prison
If I was a prophet than know you all are doomed
If not, then go on punishing me for my crime

I am not fit for this world
Fraps n freds to go the day by
Fake smiling so much even I dont know whats a lie
All these old or fat witches in Red
Same annoying shyt, eat bread, shyt bread …

Though why does the heart tremble
When seeing somewhat of a beauty
Though I can walk the dark streets
Why does seeing a beautiful woman makes me tremble

They seemed just as scared or annoyed
What is it that makes it difficult
I can easily talk to a gay dude and their mind works the same
Why does the sight of a beauty gets me momentarily stunned
Ugly and fat chicks just annoy me, beautiful ones get me tamed

Its that ‘want’ to look that bothers
Staring at someone for their beauty seems wrong
In a picture I can slide that
But when itz live, I cant hide that
That mixed feeling of want to and shouldn’t
Ticks me off cause of that dilemma of would or wouldn’t

If that beauty was claimed their for me to look at
Than it would be much easier,
Like a woman under a right hand
Justified to gaze at her figure

But until its made official,
That easiness can only exist in current
Behind a screen where life is fixed


At the end of it all
I am alone stuck with a mother
A woman justifiably worried for her well being
No living assurance for her
Being a slave from one house to another
“Must show hate to the one that loves
Or lose it all you weak being”
How sad your life is
With no assurance than to be the devil
And even with that its not a Heaven
Scarcely enjoy the fruits for being with 7
But ur heart and mind are forever chained
Forbidden to love or show any true affection
What contract have you signed mother
Do u not believe in the real heaven

Break free while you can
Even their promise of torture is only a lie
The real torture is the life you are living
Being suspicious of the one you fed
Because you committed acts that rather not be said

Whats done is by gone
Though the wounds still remain
You still want to be my only one
After all you have become?

What would make you believe
That I am thinking of your better interest
Maybe when you start to think the same of me

Its a sad life mother
You should know that better than me
I want the same for you as what you want for yourself

When will you learn to trust
Or start to act trustworthy
Telling me lies to know whats in my heart
Woman I always told the truth even now when I “lie”
Though I can see your lies
Like the shaking tail of the devil
You chose hell, soon time will come to surrender

Sooner or later, my peace is guaranteed
Be at the hands of the red, or chastisement of God
Sooner or later, peace is guaranteed